I just feel like I've messed up again, and made a couple of really dumb decisions. Sigh. And it would have been better if I were the only one "implicated", but when there's someone else affected.. If only I had better foresight in that moment. But what's done is done. What will beating myself up accomplish? Really, what do you do with days like this? When you feel like a complete, utter failure? When I am made aware of how icky and yuck my heart is, despite my best efforts to love God? I guess, it would be good to have more days like this, because on other days, the truth of the matter (about the real state of my heart) is ignorantly tucked away behind my conscience. I know that You endured so much suffering to not just restore our relationship with You, but also with one another. That is amazing. That You would actually like to have coffee with someone like me. That You would call someone like me Your friend. That You would die in the place of someo...