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Perspective

Yesterday I didn't pass my clinical exam. It is really hard especially since it's a dream so dear to my heart and one I have invested so much in. But I am learning that when I cannot trace God's hand, I can still trust His heart. His heart that breaks for us in our broken humanity and prompted Him to send His precious son, Jesus. His heart that loves me very much that He gives me fresh new mercies every morning to see me through the unique trials each day holds. His heart that is holding me together and using this difficult trial to teach me to let go of how I've defined myself by my career, ambitions or successes, but by this deep lasting relationship I have with my loving God. His heart that has given me such amazing people around me to help me keep dreaming even if it means my dreams can be shattered, and tell me they love me irrespective of this outcome. How thankful I am for all of you. And so I am learning that my relationship with God is far more pre...

After my exams, I want to..

1. Join toastmasters 2. Learn how to play my guitar better 3. Start swimming again (but the chlorine will strip the dye off my hair hmm conflicted haha) 4. Go hiking almost every Sunday 5. Experiment with new recipes and (maybe) join a bread-making class? 6. Pick up cross stitch again 7. Cook for my amazing supervisor and workmates who have been so supportive of me 8. Go travel! :) 9. Pick up painting? (get a friend to teach me how to paint with watercolours!) 10. One day, pick up the cello haha 11. Thank the Lord, again and again. Bless His name. Rejoice in Him for making my way perfect and strengthening me. Continue to grow in my confidence in Him and confidence in myself.

The past few months

"My heart is so proud, my mind is so unfocused I see the things You do through me as great things I have done And now You gently break me, then lovingly You take me And hold me as my Father and mould me as my Maker.." I was just listening to the lyrics of "Grace" by Laura Story, and it prompted me to talk with God about the things He's been teaching me the past few months. Here it is :) Dad, What could you be doing in my life right now apart from teaching me to not find my worth in success - academic, career and financial success? When better to teach me than at the start of my career? But this success addict is finding it so hard to let go of what has given me a sense of worth so much of my life. I never realised how much importance I placed on it until it became nearly impossible for me to succeed and the possibility of failure is becoming so real. I thought You abandoned me and so I got really angry at You and stopped doing what my renewed hear...

3 ways to relax according to my dog :)

When relaxing.. 1. Have a bolster handy 2. If someone rudely wakes you up to take a photo of you, refuse to cooperate and look grumpy 3. Always position yourself in the most comfortable spot

You are amazing, God

I was just reading my fear-stricken posts leading up to my internship applications last year. My favourite one has always been t his one . Even when I crumbled in fear, my Father was so patient with me, guiding me each step of the journey. I cannot believe how richly He has provided for me - I have a paid internship and I get to work in a position where I can just love people, especially people in very vulnerable positions.. It definitely has its challenges, but I feel so certain that God purposed me to be here. Help me and strengthen me, Father, to do Your will.

Did not quite expect this

It has felt amazing to be in a new town. Meet new people. Get on well with them. Be welcomed so warmly. And to start earning! But I feel it. Since I've started working and learning to stand on my own two feet.. I feel the temptation to.. value material things and love money above my relationship with God - it has been so good to be able to afford nice clothes, facials, and just pamper myself more since I've started earning. start minor swearing - especially when my clients are swearing so much and swearing back can help to build rapport. If you know me, this is shocking right? So thankful to meet a Christian youth worker last week who was also struggling in the same area and her reminding me to not compromise who I am in Christ for the world, and remembering that by not swearing, I'm giving my clients something different from what they are used to - and that not swearing has to come from a place where I'm not saying "I'm better than you", but that...