Faith Noodles

Tintin, my mixed poodle and bichon, has such a sweet nature! I've just moved back home 2 months ago. He sleeps in my parents' room right, and so, every morning when he hears my voice, he'll run out of their room and greet me, even as early as 6am! (I've woken up earlier, and he hasn't bothered to get up) My heart is so touched by this doggies affection to greet me first thing in the morning. And it just made me think about how God would feel if I excitedly wake up each morning to greet Him with affection, reverence and awe. "Good morning, Pa! I can't wait to spend this day with You! I can't wait to trust You and walk with You today! You're soo special to me! I can't wait to love and be loved by You!" Tintin was feeling unwell yesterday. It was about 9pm, I was asleep on the couch. He jumps up on the couch, walks all over me and sits on me, shivering and panting. I woke up a little startled and realise he must be feeling quite unwell be...

Hebrews 12:5-11 And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children? He said, “My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline,     and don’t give up when he corrects you. For the Lord disciplines those he loves,     and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.” As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all. Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever? For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s ...

I am in a different season in my life. A season of discipline and perseverance. I feel discouraged at times with how much work I have to do, repeated failures and I doubt myself so much. It's a season where I learn to face my deepest fears, learn to let go of them and fear the Lord instead. It's where I am learning to work hard passionately,  wholeheartedly rather than put off things because they're too scary. I am learning to discipline my mind to memorise precious chunks of psalms (not something I've done before), to be more aware of the lies of the enemy and to fix my thoughts and heart on God. I am in a season of weakness and dependence. It's uncomfortable, cold and hard. I feel ashamed at times. My fears and despair sometimes feel uncontrollable. Where I'm the one who is usually strong, supporting others and praying for them, now I have no strength. Now I am needing so much encouragement and prayers from others. I know what broken, hopeless and helples...

One evening, an elderly cherokee brave told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego." "The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith." The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old cherokee simply replied, "The one that you feed."

Holding the fear and dread in, I told my manager, L, that I was starting clinical work at my uni on Monday, but will continue to come to work at the hospital from Tuesday to Friday (which is 2 hours away from my uni, so lots of driving for me). “Please pray for me,” I said, almost in a pleading tone. “E and I miss praying with you in the mornings, Abby, and we are still praying for you,” was her reply. Feeling guilty about how I have been withdrawing from people lately, I apologised for not updating her on how I was going the past few weeks. “As I’ve been praying for you, God was showing me how He specifically chose this place for you to work in. While we don’t exactly tick the boxes needed for your exam over here and are not as structured as your uni requires you to be, you have learnt to engage with very difficult patients and that will make you a much better clinician and mentor in the future. Imagine finishing your training and only knowing how to tick boxes like your uni want...

What if God really does care for me? What if God is filled with infinite wisdom, kindness and mercy? What if God really did give up His son to die and suffer for me? What if God forgives me for the things I can't forgive myself for? What if what stabs my heart, stabs His too? What if God is hurting too? What if God will see me through?

Wait, wait for God to fulfil His promises. Even if He does not strip you off your fear immediately, wait and keep trusting Him, His Word that nothing can ever separate you from His love. Don’t hesitate to doubt your own perceptions of your situation. In proportion to your tribulations shall be your consolations! If you have shallow sorrows, you shall receive but shallow graces. But if you have deep afflictions, you shall obtain the deeper proofs of the faithfulness of God! As your days, so shall your strength be.. so let the days be long and dark, because they involve great grace and unusual patience.